The Definitive Guide to Living in the Capital , Cairo , Egypt

If you’ve ever taught, you can probably tell when a paper has been rushed to hit the deadline. And while some can pull that off, others will have you begging for it to end as it rambles on and on. Escape Plan 3 is just a rushed term paper of a movie and will have you annoyed and asking questions.

Escape Plan 3 follows security expert Ray Breslin (Sylvester Stallone) on a new mission to save the kidnapped daughter of one of the largest business tycoons in Hong Kong. But, when Breslin’s girlfriend is also captured and old vendettas are on the table, Breslin has to lead his team into a maze-like prison complex in a nearly impossible rescue mission.

Yes, they made a third one because that’s exactly what the world needs – another macho Sylvester Stallone movie in another attempt to revive the good old days. Except that this third instalment is even worse than the previous two. The first film showed some effort in crafting the obstacles that faced the protagonist and also had just a smidge of wit. That decreased in the second film and vanished completely in this one.

Escape Plan 3’s plot has been stripped down to a basic rescue mission that is so generic and openly shallow its details. For example, how Breslin finds where the hostages are held; the bad guy sends him a video with a huge, unique painting on the wall behind him, so Breslin makes a call to someone who identifies it in seconds. Really? The supposedly sadistically smart villain couldn’t have moved two steps to the right to get the painting out of the frame? No, and you know why not? So we can get to the action part fast enough.

Another huge issue with plausibility is how the death of Breslin’s girlfriend is handled (yes, that is a spoiler, but you really shouldn’t watch this movie anyway). Breslin does not even shed a tear, he watches a guy slit his girlfriend’s throat, and he does not shed a tear. He just screams, seemingly more because he’s lost than because he loved her, and then by the end of the film, which is not 15 minutes from her death, he is joking with his buddy and laughing like nothing happened.

Even the action in the film is not impressive enough for it to be the sole reason to watch it. The makers seem to be relying on Stallone and Bautista’s presence for it to make some mediocre money, and then be buried and forgotten.

For the acting, Sylvester Stallone’s face hasn’t moved since God knows when, so emotions are out the window. Dave Bautista isn’t exactly Al Pacino either, with just a shuffle between a jokey and a serious tone of voice with the same face throughout the film.

There is really no reason you should see this movie; if you want to watch Sylvester Stallone kick some ass, watch some of his old movies, and if you want to watch Dave Bautista kick some ass, then just watch his wrestling matches. But don’t watch this film.